The scene is set in a large open field. A man dressed up in jeans and a t-shirt that reads, "You can save 15 relatives or more from purgatory by switching to SaintCo" walks up to a podium that is set on a large stage. A crowd of around 100,000 clusters around the stage. From the ground emerges St. Joan of Arc, wearing leather pants and a tank top with a pink mohawk and carrying a guitar that breathes fire. To her far left, coming from the sky is Hildebrand on a large drumset, She's wearing a business suit and short shorts. Behind all of them emerges Francis of Assisi on a large electric organ with glowing neon pipes that read "Holy Crashers". Dante grabs the mic as the tune of Rebecca Black's "Friday" plays in the background. Behind the stage, the Kool-Aid man dressed as a pope watches and waits...
*Dante begins to sing
Oh-oh-oh-oh x 7
Oh oh Oh oh yeahh-yeah
Yeah-Yeah-Yeah x 7
5 in the morning
Gotta get the kids up
Must eat stale bread and drink wine
Gotta get up to beat the line
At the church yard on the right side (right side)
When I get ouside, I see some Moors!
Kickin' out heretics
Setting up idols
Make sure the monks are prayin'
'Cause its the Lord's Day
It's Sunday (Sunday),
Everybody pray on Sunday
Everyone in the village can't wait to pray, to pray
It's Sunday (Sunday)
Gotta pay the church on Sunday
Otherwise I can't get my son out of purgatory
Hail Mary, Hail Mary
Full of Grace, Full of (Joan-shut yo mouth!)
Cool, Awesome, Tubular, Spectacular
Everyone's lovin' the Lord's Day
Trotting on the road towards Munich
See a bunch of nuns, movin' their hips
Catch a big cart with alot of "heretics"
My 12 year old wife to the right (*winks to crowd)
My 50 year old wife on the left (*pulls out a finger)
I didn't hit either of them, I so did not
Oh, hi Saint Mark!
My feet are so bloody
I see people running to the end of the world
Don't they know anything about geography?
(a merchant pulls out a tuft of hair)
Look at that, it's the back hair of St. Foix!
Sunday (Sunday)
Everybody pray on Sunday
Otherwise Satan will roast your soul in hell
Sunday (Sunday)
Remember to pay on Sunday
Because our Pope says that it's the will of God
(Joan takes mic)
Praying, Praying, sweet
So, here's ma story
I got a bright flash in my face (light shines on Joan only)
And a big booming voice says (Kool Aid Man tells Joan to go to Orleans)
Then he tells me to "Be a Man! Just as swift as the Seine River!"
So I take a helmet, and kick English (censored)
(music changes to a soft piano solo)
I was taken, by the church, they dared not to believe my tale
And thus, they want me at the staaaaaaaaakeee.
(Kool-Aid Man bursts through a wall)
Oh yeah! Pope Alexander is in da housee
(Dante grabs mic, in background random women start touching the KAM)
Now you see, now you see, why we love the church
Look over there, I see some monks (they're worshipping a statue of St. Francis)
Look over there, is that an orgy!?
Yesterday, the day before that , we did the Lord's work
We did our Hail Mary's (what)
And our penances, devotions
Just to forgive our sins
But Jesus still loves us, because the Pope says so (he's #1)
Even though half my village is totally gone
Oh well, it's Sunday (Sunday)
Everybody pay on Sunday
Because the Lord says your money will
Wipe out evil (evil)
Sunday (Sunday)
Everybody pay on Sunday
Look at those pimped out monks (gold monks walk across stage)
And those pimpin' Popes (groups of popes surrounded by women walk across)
Praying Praying yeah yeah
We'll be doin the Lord's work (His work)
Every day but Sunday.
There's the song called Sunday.
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